The Line Between Courage and Confidence

I heard Beau Lotto, the neuroscientist whose TED talk on illusions has generated over 5 million views, speak at a conference* during which he said:

“courage is more important than confidence”

I think he is right. If you are given the choice to be confident or courageous, you should always choose courage. Especially in our conversations that inform decisions.

Confidence is believing you can. Courage is knowing that you might fail, but doing it anyway.

Confidence’s posture is upright, which makes it fragile. Confidence can’t fail. Courage leans into the wind, gets up when it falls down, and is more resilient.

Confidence is proud and can push others away. Courage is vulnerable and draws others in.

Confidence can be external facing, seeking the approval of others. Some acts of courage are public and heroic, but many are private and quiet. Doing the right thing, even when it is hard and no one is looking.

Confidence is complete and closed off to learning new things. Courage requires it.

Confidence requires prior relevant experience (otherwise it starts slipping into the danger zone of “over confidence”). Courage can forge it’s own path.

Confidence is a feeling. Courage is a decision to act.

Cultivating courage has never been more important. Especially in light of the renewed and intense focus on racial and gender equity, interrupting unconscious bias, global health pandemics, and the current pace and scope of technical innovation.

Studies, like the three selected for the Journal of Positive Psychology by Matt C. Howard and Joshua E. Cogswell seek to predict the day-to-day social courage of employees in the workplace and have found that those with grit and a proactive personality demonstrated greater social course, after controlling statistically for other factors. Age was also seen to be a strong predictor of courage, more predictive than gender. But no matter your personality or environment, you are not exempted from acting courageously.

Every day we are all attempting to do things that no one has ever done well. No one who is brutally honest with themselves can be confident. After all, most of us can’t look to our childhood heroes, our professional mentors, or the history books for all the answers. Learning, and the related process of unlearning, is an act of courage.

*The conference was TIDE (Technology, Innovation, Design, and Experience) produced by Avixa in conjunction with the InfoComm show. Amazing event. You should go!